he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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