i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize
