Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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