Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize