can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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