Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
