this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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