my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
be right there i have to get my cape
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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