he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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