...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
