But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
