I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
so much tequila, so little girl.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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