I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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