I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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