oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Randomize
