He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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