i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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