Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
