He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
