yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
