Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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