No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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