If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
