I think I just saw someone hide a body.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
