her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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