I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
