Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
