would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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