Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
