I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
