Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
he quoted the bible to break up with me
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
