I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
