you guys were way drunker than both of me
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
being pregnant is like rehab
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
my poor anus
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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