So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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