hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
