? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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