I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
