It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Someone shattered a urinal.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
