That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize