Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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