we should wear snuggies to the strip club
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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