By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize