can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
