I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Randomize
