You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
This is classic penis vs brain.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize