After last night, I could never be a politician.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
