i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
