I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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