You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
It's shark week go big or go home
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
