Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
